Good evening! It was absolutely a gorgeous day today – sunny, a bit warm, but overall my mood is elevated and I am acting a little more sane. I have been waking up a little earlier, about 8:30 or 9:00 but have been rolling back over until my normal noon. It is promising though and I hope that I continue to see that pattern. My walks have been really nice, being in the sun helps and the temperatures have been tolerable. I have to laugh at myself though heading out in a coat and toboggan with my gloves at 55 degrees – REALLY? What can I say, it’s comfortable. I am going to have to start scheduling some outside events because the house is driving me crazy. Instead of being a place of comfort and retreat it is becoming a prison. I could start some civilized projects like rearranging the panty,
going through my closet and drawers and just getting rid of some of the junk that I tend to accumulate. The other day I came across a casino chip in one of my drawers along with some Mardi Gras coins and beads – art project? junk? memorabilia? or just to lazy to throw it out? But those tasks have absolutely zero appeal – then again, either does sitting around recovering from cancer treatment – so I will look into that after the taxes are finished. That has been the daily effort this week. I really envy the “organized” people of the world. I get it into the right files and with like items, but instead of handling it daily I wait until January every year to drag it all out, put it in order and get it down on paper. I have the best of intentions and get a little closer every year, but at the rate that I am going it will be another 10 years before my system becomes refined.
I have been spending some time on the American Cancer Society’s Cancer Survivor Network since I started researching treatment recovery patterns last weekend. I wish that I had know that this was here earlier. The site allows you to go to cancer specific areas to see what other people with your type of cancer are experiencing or have experienced. It also allows you to post questions and respond to others with tips and encouragement. I realized very quickly how truly blessed I am. Given the circumstances I never had to take a pain pill, never threw up, did not have to have a feeding tube and have only experienced moderate side effects. And it has become apparent that faith in God, a positive outlook and being able to laugh at yourself is incredibly important to the process. I am amazed at the number of people who write in about their spouses and their unwillingness to treat symptoms or in some cases even try. As much as you have heard me bitch and moan about everything that I have been through and will go through you can rest assured that I am grateful for a loving God of my understanding, for Kathy and Jan for walking with me, the people who are capable of donating to the Go -Fund-Me account, the multitudes who have penned notes and cards, the gifts, the texts, the Facebook comments, the prayers, the phone calls, the kind words and the readers of this blog. It is reassuring that I have not had to or will have to take a step by myself unless I chose to toward the cure of this frightening, humbling and fatal disease. God is good to those who let him.
LESSON OF THE DAY – “Remember this also: it’s always easy to look back and see what we were, yesterday, ten years ago. It is hard to see what we are.”