Welcome to 2018! I hope that your holidays filled you with love and gratitude for all that you have. I know it did for me. Being slowed down gave me the chance to spend time with Kathy. We have been hunkered down in the house in our pajamas in front of the fire since Friday night. Sure there have been the occasional getting showered, dressed and out in the world missions but they did not come without discussion. Do we need it? Does someone else need it? AND can we get back home in under 2 hours? Last night we took some white bean chicken chili down to Bernard and Susie and set down with them for a couple of hours only to dash back, stoke the fire and change back into our pajamas! Now there was some
productive time, but more on Kathy’s part than mine. Yesterday we made designer paper. I will say up front that I was more technical and moral support, but we started by shredding white paper in the paper shredder. Next, we pulverized the shredded paper, water and colored thread that Kat’s mom had collected in a blender to make a slurry . Kat’s mom was a quilter and when she cut away frayed ends of fabric she collected them in a piece of Tupperware. I made a deckle which is a frame that has stretched screen and a raise top that you pour the slurry onto to form your sheet. Then you let it dry. We hurried that process by setting it next to the fireplace.
Today’s adventure was alcohol ink pictures. I can really see potential projects with both projects. Tonight we are just pretending that tomorrow isn’t coming because the holiday’s officially end tonight. At least there aren’t a lot of decorations to put up! There
is a God!
2017 has taught me quite a bit about myself – again. I am grateful that God gives me the chance to go through the process of introspection every so often. Getting sober, losing Sally and finding Kathy, 3 months in Maine and this bought with cancer, each one has taught me so much about myself. The magic really happened when I started writing it down in Maine – it has been so impactful and I do appreciate your comments and interaction. Some don’t sound like a trip that we would like to take, but they have shaped me into the person that I am today and I would not trade them for anything. As I look back on these adventures the thing that stands out is that in each case I walk away with a stronger relationship with God and a better understanding of my role in the relationship. As I have said over and over during the last 2 1/2 months, do the next right thing, follow instructions, live one day at a time, forgive, love and trust that God’s plan is better than mine. My life is so gratifying and easy when I live this way, it’s not always fun, comfortable, easy or desirable, but each of those conditions become tolerable when I do. So my resolution for 2018 is to do my best to continue this process. Instead of the Lesson Of The Day tonight I would like to leave you with a prayer that was shared with me by my father during early sobriety:
I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
nor do I really know myself,
and the fact that I think I am following your will
does not mean that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that the desire to please you
does in fact please you.
And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
Therefore will I trust you always though
I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear, for you are ever with me,
and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.