This is without a doubt the most confusing treatment that I have ever been associated with! Yesterday I was ready to tackle the world – today was a day of rest and repair. I did not roll out of bed until the afternoon! It was 12:40 when I finally got up and it didn’t get any different than that. Due to the rain and dark outside Sydney didn’t even get up. She did some sweet quiet chirps like she does at night when we go to bed, but no squawking, We shared some breakfast, I addressed my emails and retired immediately to the couch where I napped until Kathy got home at 6:30. I did eat and drink regularly eating 4 peanut butter sandwiches and an omelette for dinner – swilled down with a couple of ensures to get my calories for the day.
You know I am okay with it today, it is life on life’s terms. I am learning that if you want to get something done you better do it when you think about it – because tomorrow is NOT promised. It really strengthened this attitude toward life that I am adopting as a result of this disease. Don’t put off until tomorrow something that is important to you today. Telling someone that you love them, the phone call to your mom, checking on your brother or son, writing that thank you note. It’s not what I used to consider critical, yes I have to go to work, or pay my bills, but does the house really need to be cleaned, do I have to watch that TV show, or do I really need to go to the store? Or is the time better spent taking care of myself or spending time with someone important to me? What about that kid with cancer, does he need someone to play with at the art table or in the playroom. Could someone use a blanket or one of the many knit caps that you have collected? Is there an elder that needs a hand or someone you know who is sick that may need groceries or just a visitor? When I first got sober, I was complaining to my sponsor and his sponsor about how Sally didn’t always appreciate me being sober and how that wasn’t enough. Bob J. looked at me and and gave me an assignment for the next 10 meetings that I attended. I was to raise my hand 1st to share with the group and that point I was to stand and announce to the group that “I may not be much, but I am all that I ever think about” and sit down and listen for the rest of the meeting. It didn’t take long before I understood the lesson of the exercise, left to my own best thinking – it was all about me. It has taken 19 years to get out of that frame of mind and start to think about what others need and what I can do to accommodate some of those needs rather than focusing on my wants. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly, it will materialize if we work for it.
LESSON OF THE DAY – “Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact.” William James