I look at the header tonight and say silently to myself “What The Fuck?” (pardon me, we claim spiritual progress not perfection) How did WE get here from there? It is like when I first got sober, my daddy gave me a “Twenty- Four Hours a Day” book from Hazeldon and each morning after my prayers I would carefully mark the number of the day that I stayed sober on the day before, then start the reading for the day. I still carry that book in the console of the truck some 19 years later to bail me out when I need it. I get the same feeling when I look at 3 more treatments to go. Where in the hell did 36 days, 6 chemotherapy and 33 radiation treatments go? I suspect into your loving hearts one day at a time.
Short one tonight – I got my ass handed to me today in a brown paper bag – no note, no wrapping. I had another foamy night followed by the alarm at 6 am. Radiation treatment at 8:20 and sitting in the lobby icing down before my last meeting with Dr. Gutherie. I fell asleep during the radiation treatment and almost did it again in the lobby with an ice pack on my neck. I forced myself to get up and headed to the restroom to put on my aloe vera and Aquaphor, hopped in the truck and drove to Lavilla. Official weight 177 lbs, same as yesterday – down 9 lbs. He praised my care and we scheduled a follow-up on December 22nd. Next Vampirella took 9 tubes of blood for testing – I thought that I was going to pass out! Then came Kelly – today only one vein was dry so after the second attempt we were ready. We started with the anti-nausea due to the reaction last week and we almost made it to a 1/2 bag before my palate started itching. After consultation with the drug expert and the doctors, because I was having no breathing distress or swelling we slowed down the infusion, added a bag of saline and filled me full of IV Benydryl. Boom, Boom – Out Go The Lights! Next thing I knew it was 4 hours later when I came out of dreamland. I got hugs from everybody with a reminder to come in for saline if I needed it I came home to my sweet baby, iced down, crawled on the couch for a nap. I think that I am going to sleep well tonight and if I don’t – tomorrow is the last treatment of the week! 4 DAYS OFF! Good night friends we can mark another off together in the morning.